Pain but no gain..

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. highest tensen level yg pernah aku alami, datang lagi.. takut tak buleh nak face dah, walaupun sku berjaya norikoeta sblm nih.. but bukan dgn cara setel, tapi lari.. kali ni rasa macam tak buleh lari dah..

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. walaupun baru dapat increment, kerja aku pun makin bertambah.. kerja yg lama pulak maintain.. byk kerja tak siap, sampai kena bawak balik rumah.. stay kat opis, balik lamat plak.. isteri..? anak..?

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. byk utang blom bayo.. bank dok kejo ari2.. surat lawyer tiap2 hari datang.. bila nak bayo..? gaji lagi 2 minggu.. raya dah dekat.. aper pun takder lagi..

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. org yg aku sayangi tak memahami aku lagi at certain point.. bila aku byk tensen, aku jadi pemarah.. aku marah org yg aku sayangi.. aku lari dari org yg aku sayangi.. kesian dia.. bukan salah sesapa.. keadaan tak sesuai..

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. i never paid my parent back.. not by money, but by anything.. i call, but is it enough..?

aku tensen.. sgt2 tensen.. i'm full of sin.. i've been punished for my sin.. i have to take it all.. i don't want to die, but i have to take it all.. i got no choice but to take it all..

but i do know.. i'm always thinking, there are more worse people than me, but they are living their life.. why shouldn't i..? i must live my own life too.. u hate your life..? me..? maybe.. but i love myself, who can survive such of this type of life..

Saturday, September 08, 2007